Here’s an interesting fact- the vast majority of engaged couples spend much more time preparing for their wedding day than they do preparing for their marriage.
After all, when two people are so in love, what could possibly go wrong?
We all know… A LOT!
As a marriage counselor, I often witness marriages in crisis.
While I love working with couples in crisis, I would bet the couples would not describe being in crisis as a great experience…
Therefore, when a couple comes to my office wanting to ensure they grow more in their relationship prior to their wedding day, I am elated. Premarital counseling can reveal unknown expectations and desires and help manage expectations.
Asking questions in premarital counseling leads to clarity. As Brene Brown states: CLEAR IS KIND. When we are clear on our expectations, wishes, desires- and when we can communicate those effectively- there is greater trust and understanding.
With that, let’s move on to premarital counseling questions you and your partner may want to discuss.
Yes, conflict is natural and happens in every ongoing relationship. Do you have a plan for how you will handle it? Here are some prompts that may help you better answer that question:
Does one person enjoy putting long hours in their job while the other clocks out a few minutes before quitting time? Consider these questions regarding career expectations:
Children change a marriage in many ways. Oftentimes, engaged couples don’t know what questions to ask about the realities of having children. Below are some questions to consider:
Whether you’re spiritual, religious, atheist, or somewhere in between, religion can be a tough topic for couples! Secular premarital counseling provides the opportunity to get curious and ask questions like:
Most engaged couples would not rate finances as the most exciting thing to think about when it comes to getting married… which is a shame. Studies show that money ranks very high on the reasons couples argue. Those financial arguments are the top predictors of divorce. Here are some questions to ponder:
Please keep in mind, a pre-marriage counselor will tailor questions and sessions to your unique situation and relationship. Premarital counseling is a great way for couples who are committed to building a strong marriage and gain skills for communicating effectively.
In the meantime, are you ready to give therapy a go?
Free free to contact me directly if you have questions or to schedule a brief call to see if I might be able to support you as you journey forward.
Jill
As a marriage and family therapist, I also offer:
Relationship Counseling
Individual Counseling