Self Therapy:
31 Questions You Can Ask Yourself

I’m going to start off this blog post where I left off in my last post.


I stated:  


Ultimately, my goal is to help you gain clarity and get you back on your own unique path so you have the confidence and tools…

to fully rely on yourself...

so you can live your own best life…

not your mom or dad's idea of your best life...
not your therapist's idea of your best life...

but your own best life.

How do you do this, you may ask…


There are many questions that I ask my clients to help them figure out what is right for them.

There’s no reason why you can’t do a little self therapy and ask yourself these questions I often ask my clients:  

Self Therapy Exception Questions:

  • List times when your problem would have been expected to occur but didn’t.
  • List times when the problem isn’t quite as severe as it normally is
    • Contemplate and write out what you are doing, thinking, or saying when the problem isn’t happening.

Self Therapy & Previous Solution Questions:



List times when you have successfully navigated or resolved the same problem.

List times when you have successfully navigated or resolved a somewhat similar problem.

Can’t think of a time... Not a problem!

Find someone in your life who has solved a similar problem and think about why they handled the problem so well.

Self Therapy & Your Unique Competences Questions:

  • List your skills
  • List your abilities
Can’t think of your skills and abilities? Fear not!
  • Think about what you do well or know a lot about.  Where do you feel competent or confident?
      • Hobbies/Interests
      • Work skills or knowledge
      • Social Skills or abilities
      • Artistic skills 
  • List people that believe/believed in you… who thinks the best of you and sees your potential.  Ask that person(s) what they would say are your strongest skills and abilities.
  • What advice would you give your friends if they were facing a similar problem?

Self Therapy & Backsliding Questions:

  • If you have a backslide, how will get back on track?  
  • When you have reversed course in the past, what has helped you to get back on track?

Self Therapy & Resource Questions:

Who could you ask for help or support to cope with your problem?   

Is there someone who could help you resolve this problem?

How might you use your outside resources to help you solve or cope with a problem?

Self Therapy & The Future-Without-The-Problem Questions:

  • Imagine you didn’t have the problem
    • What would you be doing and thinking?
    • How would other people know the problem was no longer troubling you… even if you didn’t tell them.
    • Shut your eyes and notice what a future-without-the-problem looks like in your imagination.
    • What metaphors or images come to mind?

Self Therapy & Positive Coping Questions:

  • When have you been able to cope positively with this problem?
  • Why isn’t the problem always worse or does not always occur?
  • What advice or comfort might you give to others that are going through the same kind of problem or suffering?


Self Therapy & Bouncing Back From Setback Questions:

  • In the past, how have you come back from setbacks?
  • What would you say (or other people say) are your natural resiliences?
  • If you aren’t able to look back and name things, try looking to the future:
    • What would you like to be doing?  
    • How would you like your future to be?
    • How would you like to be helping people?
    • What do you want?
    • What do you long for?
    • Where do you see yourself when your life works out and you are through these problems?

After looking at these questions, I hope you notice a theme:

You are your own best source of advice and inspiration.

You know what has worked in the past.  You know what motivates you.  You know what is meaningful and important to you.  


Hopefully, these questions have helped you to tease out your strengths and skills.  


Fun fact: These types of questions have been found to be helpful for organizations too.  

Watch the video below to hear more questions that may be helpful to you personally and professionally!

Are you ready to give therapy a go?

Free free to contact me directly if you have questions or to schedule a brief call to see if I might be able to support you as you journey forward.


Looking for mental health services in Indy?

As a marriage and family therapist, I also offer: 

Let's Talk! Schedule a Free 15-Minute Phone Consultation
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